the new norm {when the c word crashes your world}

Day and night my lips with praise Him.
I have His armor on, He is my protector.
Though I am weary, He is not.
He has already bore this burden.
He is always ahead of me. Of this.
I am a child of the King.
There is nothing He cannot do.

I woke this morning in a hospital bed next two my two year who was woke throughout the night to be checked every few hours and ripped her IV out in the middle of the night. This is our new norm.

The playroom at the hospital has a basket of free hats and a play body scanning toy.  This is our new norm.

I left my recently turned one year old overnight for the first time when I wasn't ready to do it. This is our new norm.

I took a quick shower this morning with Naomi standing outside the shower begging for me to be done. This is our new norm.

She just wanted a drink of water this morning. But she can't eat or drink for hours and hours for testing and surgery. So I won't either because I won't do it in front of her. This is our new norm.

We became the picture and status everyone shares that you read and your heart breaks. Within hours of the news I had hundreds of requests on Instagram because people want to know this child's face who is battling cancer. This is our new norm.

The amount of love and encouragement we have felt through visits, phone calls, texts, emails, Facebook messages and comments, and Instagram  is remarkable. Thank you for sharing our story, our new norm. We truly believe in the power of prayer and that our Mighty God is in every moment of this.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. Corinthians 12:9

So here we are, taking it a a day a time. Remembering that every single day is a gift. Yesterday we took Naomi to the doctor just to take care of a cough she had, only to find out through an xray, cat-scan, and blood work that it is actually a very large tumor near her lungs, partially blocking her trachea causing her difficult breathing and coughing. We don't have a lot of answers right now. Today we tackle a biopsy and bone marrow check to see if the cancer has spread. The biopsy will confirm if it is in fact Neuroblastoma and how aggressive it is. The results for this can take a few days. Then our team of doctors will decide what the best treatment plan will be, which will most likely include chemo and radiation. We don't know how long we will be at Riley in Indianapolis. But we are thankful we are only a little over an hour drive away from home, so family and friends can visit.

I'm having a difficult time processing this as our new lifestyle. That I won't be waking up with my three loves wondering why they can't ever sleep in and what type of fun we will be doing for the day--play outside in the sprinkler? Head to the library? Go on a walk? Have a dance party? Eat lunch under a fort or on the front porch?

Today I won't be able to do those things, but I can snuggle with my sweet Naomi, look forward to a visit from Lincoln and Audrey, and turn my eyes to Jesus. And remember, today is a gift.

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