8.09.2009

This is the Way it is Suppose to be.

It happened to me today. I'm sitting in church, the sermon is going on, and then I see it. The number. The number your child is assigned to in the nursery in case they need to get a hold of you. And oh, is it obvious when the parent has to stand up in the middle of the sermon and walk out immediately after the number is placed on the screen. The very-large-screens-on-both-sides-of-the-church. It might as well state "Audrey is screaming her head off for her mom. Please come immediately."

I'm walking. Smiling at everyone. Pretending that it is no big deal that I am about to go get my hysterically crying baby.

But it is a big deal. ALL the other babies were as content as can be. But my poor sweet baby girl was yelling for "mom mom mom" and sobbing. I immediately rescued her. I get the response "she isn't away from you very much, now, is she?" This caused a am I doing the right thing, parenting question, inside of me? Am I suppose to be away from her more?

Then I realized...

As a matter of fact. No, she isn't ever away from me. And I have wanted it to be that way. Not because she can't be, but because I don't want her to be. I LOVE having her near me all the time. [Okay, confession: I like having her around all the time, but sometimes I get frusterated and wishing for a break, but you get the idea.]

She is a happy, easy-going baby. And if she cries when I am not around, who can blame her?

She is suppose to be with me all the time. This is the way it is suppose to be. For me. For now.

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