12.11.2010

this is mothering.

Mothering is about finding a balance. Mothers aren't perfect. But for some reason we hold ourselves to an extra-high standard. And when we fail, we try to hide it under a rug. Well, let me show you what's under my rug.

Yesterday was tough, folks. In fact, the past couple of days have challenged me as a mom. Audrey caught a big o-cold that resulted in tons of nose wiping, which resulted in tears because of pretty much wiping it raw. And Naomi had her two month shots that resulted in grumpiness. My little easy-going, barely ever cries, sleep through the night baby got vaccines and now she is all out of her element. And now? I'm definitely questioning vaccines. At least, giving them to such a tiny little body.

So between the lack of sleep, the sickness, and grumpiness, I give my mothering skills a C (and that's being generous to myself). Seriously. Yesterday, I was getting annoyed with just hearing Audrey say the word, Mama, over and over. Which is completely dumb, because I love being called Mama, but after 1,238 times, I was ready to be called Bob or something.

Then we went out to dinner and Audrey kept kissing and hugging me and sharing her milk with me. And my heart melted. And I thought, how could I get so upset with this sweet bundle of love? Then we left the restaurant and she broke down in the car and I was reminded why I was so tired and grumpy and wanted to be Bob.

So, this is mothering. It's not always easy. There's joy, challenges, and love. But at the end of the day, love always prevails.


(Audrey and Naomi at Monkey Joe's. And yes, that first picture is blurry, because she.did.not.stop.moving inside that bouncy house.)

No comments: